Reflective Post: You Deserve Better

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A few months ago, I took a trip to a local small park beach. It wasn't planned. I was very emotional after not being well and being on an antibiotic. I had also had tough conversation that same morning.  I left home feeling alone, hurt, insecure and confused. 

I sat at one of the benches closest to the beach alone with my sunglasses on and cried. I was feeling defeated and heartbroken. I thought about the areas of my life where I felt I failed, where I was failed and I poured my broken heart out through tears at the beach.  It was then I heard something inside me say, "You deserve better". 

I had thought this before. All the other times I've heard it within me I didn't believe it was true. This time was different. For the first time ever, it touched my heart and I believed that I did deserve better. Not in just one area of my life, but all the areas of my life; my relationship with myself, my family, my work, friendships and more. There was too much settling going on. I knew that it was because of heartbreak and so much disappointment. It was brave that I was able to push through disappointments but that day, I could not escape grief.

I stayed until I got too cold to hold still. I went home to reengaged with my life, as is. I knew something about me was different. I didn't force life to reveal the how right away.  I knew that I needed to pray different prayers and do some more deep reflection. 

Living a Life of Creativity is about accepting truth and giving it time to settle in and wait for the "how".